John Nelson Hays (c.1833‒) and Margaret Gay

As noted on the Union County marriage record above, "Nelson Hays" married Margaret Gay on April 15, 1852. The name on the marriage index for that period, below, matches that record. Nelson, however, appears to have been his middle name. It is likely he used the name Nelson to differentiate himself from his father,  John Hays (c.1797‒1878), who was in Mecklenburg/Union County by 1830.

There is some confusion as to Nelson's first name. The 1860 census, below, recorded his name as "John" N. Hays. When he enlisted in the Confederate Army in 1862, he enrolled as "John" N. Hays. However, there is one document noting his first name as "Thomas" Nelson Hayes: It is the 1924 death certificate of his son William Thomas Hayes. The informant on the death certificate is Fred W. Hayes, W.T. Hayes' son. In 1924, John Nelson Hays had been missing from the Union County records for 59 years, since the end of the Civil War in 1865. Fred W. Hayes, born 1882, never knew his grandfather and likely guessed at his first name. That explanation seems to be the most probable explanation for the discrepancy. We believe the correct name of this most important direct ancestor is John Nelson Hays. It appears the "e" was added to the Hays spelling during the lifetime of his wife and children, first noted on the 1870 census below, when Margaret was noted as a widow.

John Nelson Hays' wife, Margaret Gay, was born on May 19, 1833, possibly in Kershaw County, South Carolina, to Thomas Nathanial Knox "TN" Gay and Bethany Bass. The 1850 Kershaw County South Carolina Census recorded: Margaret Gay 18, in household with "Thenia" 43, George W. 21, Martha 22, Isaac 16, Jesse 15, and 12-year-old twins Nathaniel and William Thomas Gay.

Nelson and Margaret had a son and daughter before the Civil War began:

• William Thomas Hayes (1857‒1924)

• Margaret Ellen "Maggie" Hayes (1859‒1936)

From the 1860 Union County Census

The 1860 Union County Census ‒ P.O. Monroe, recorded: John N. Hays 25, carpenter, with Margaret 26, Thomas 5, and Margaret E. 2; personal estate $50.

John N. Hays left his wife of ten years, a 7-year-old son and a 4-year-old daughter to serve the Confederacy. He and younger brother, William N. Hays both enlisted in the Confederate Army on March 8, 1862. John was 28 with a birth year listed as 1834. His unit was the 10th Battalion, North Carolina Heavy Artillery, Company C, a regiment organized on May 19, 1862. Our direct ancestor went in with the rank of Private and was released as a Private. The 10th Battalion surrendered with the Army of Tennessee on April 26, 1865. John Nelson Hays was released from service that same day. What happened next is murky.

The 1870 Union County Census ‒ Buford Township, P.O. Monroe, recorded" widow* Margaret Hayes 38, William 13, and Margaret 10. They were recorded near two other Gay households, one headed by Parthenia Gay 62 [probably Margaret's mother; the other household headed by Nathaniel Gay [perhaps Margaret's brother.] *The mystery: Though Margaret Gay Hayes was recorded as a widow on this census; no death certificate has been found for husband John Nelson Hays.

The 1880 Mecklenburg County Census recorded Margaret Gay Hayes as a  47-year-old widow living in Clear Creek Township, with farmer/son William Thomas Hayes 24, Elizabeth 23, and two daughters, 2-year-old Minnie and 1-year-old Bessie Hayes.

Margaret Gay Hayes died September 1, 1895. She was buried in the Gay Family Cemetery in Alton, Union County, off highway 207. 

On September 14, 2000, Steve & wife Margie Hayes, Tom "Bubber" Hayes and Eleanor Hayes, widow of Grayson Hayes drove to the Gay family Cemetery in the Alton community of Union County, NC. The headstone for Margaret Gay Hayes was located, but the grave site for John Nelson Hays was not found.

The Rest of the Story on John Nelson Hays